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Listen to “hypermadboo’s” advise. She has given the best answer so far! Surgery is superficial and shouldn’t be done so that you can feel loved by your husband. It’s possible that he may not realize that he stopped showing you so much affection or attention. You need to open up to him and express how you feel, give him a chance to change his routine and remind him that you still like attention and that he can’t get too comfortable.
This is why I tell women, DON’T gain a ton of weight when you are pregnant. Yes you can take off the weight, but you can’t get rid of all those stretch marks. I would get a membership at a gym and force yourself to work out at least 3 times a week. Get yourself into shape and if you still have saggy skin, then you might need a tummy tuck. I would see a plastic surgeon and see if there is some new treatment they can do now to tone down or get rid of the stretch marks.
Next time you decide to have a baby, don’t gain more then 25 pounds and shoot closer to 20 pounds. You don’t need to gain 50+ pounds to have a healthy baby. I gained 24 pounds when I was pregnant, my baby weighed 8 lbs. 4 oz. and when I came home from the hospital, I weighed 3 lbs more then I weighed before I got pregnant and I had very few stretch marks. Keeping your weight down really pays off.
I know how you feel about the way you look after giving birth. A friend of mine gained 72 lbs. when she was pregnant and she has the same problem you have. Don’t do what she does and refuse to let her husband see her naked and keep the lights off and only make love when it’s dark. Having a baby completely blew her self esteem.
Go to the gym and see a plastic surgeon. DON’T do it for your husband, do it for yourself : )
Your husband is a fool! If all he wants is body beautiful than he isn’t much of a man. And if he won’t touch you. he might be getting it somewhere else. My husband couldn’t wait to have sex again. he wouldn’t leave me alone. I didn’t like my body. but he said that it was beautiful because that is where our son came from. You need to sit him down and have a long talk and tell him how you are feeling. And I’d come out and ask him if he were seeing some one else. I find it so hard to believe he won’t touch you. Good Luck.
you HAVE to communicate TO HIM that you feel this way! you wont even WANT to look better unless he knows how you feel; and you know how HE really feels.. after its discussed, just work out.. even 30 minutes a day is a start! Exercise videos? Running.. anything.. to look better.. but more than anything.. to feel better!
best of luck!
First of all, I want to say I’m so sorry your feeling that way. I’m sure that’s very hard to deal with. Do you think your beautiful? If so, that’s all that matters and if he can’t see that then he’s blind. But if you don’t feel beautiful do something to make you feel so. Put on makeup. Wear something sexy, put on some heels. Once you feel good about yourself, others will notice.
Don’t be listening to people telling you to get surgery. Surgery is something that has to be thought over and discussed for a long time, and has to be something you really want to do. If you were ever going to have surgery, it should be for you and not for your husband.
As for being more attractive to him, you’ve just had a baby, regardless of stretch marks, or saggy skin, you are the mother of his child and should be the most beautiful thing in the world to him. You need to sit down and talk to him, find out where his problems are. Yes attraction is important in a marriage but so is communication and you shouldn’t have to feel like you have to get rid of these natural marks for a man that is supposed to love you regardless.
He should be supporting you.
However it could also be that maybe he’s just gotten himself into a routine and now use have had a baby, finding time for eachother doesn’t seem like a big priority. Buy some new underwear, get your hair done and nails done, make yourself feel great and have a night just for the two of you. Show him that stretch marks and all you are still the sexy woman he married.
Please don’t get down about this, you need to look out for yourself, if he doesn’t find you attractive, he’s obviously not the man you thought he was. All the best xx
First of all your husband is being silly, he’s the cause of your pregnancy.
Second anyone that see your stretch marks should love you enough to not care that they are there. Every woman’s body changes after having a baby and a man that acts indifferent because of that has problems. It’s not you, stop chasing after him to kiss you or show interest in you. Pour your love and affection and attention on the baby, get your body in shape for yourself and soon your husband will stop acting like a baby wanting to be pampered and chased.
Oh boy this is a tough one. To be honest I do not know what to tell you. I am sure you have told him how you feel and that didnt help….I really do not know what some guys think will happen when a womens body is streched out of shape from having THEIR child. My self it has not changed in ANYWAY how much I get turned on by my wife….and she has had 5 of MY children. I still find her as Hot as I always did….but I guess that is just me. I am sorry for your pain and I wish I knew what to tell you……I am sure lots will tell you to work out and ge back into shape….but the truth is he should love you for you…….not what your body looks like now
Best of luck
get some exercise equipment, lose weight not for him, but for yourself and to keep up with your kid. Trust me, your spending too much time on him, thats the problem. Ignore him, just pay attention to your kid, exercise, work out, and he’ll come around. Also, get him involved with taking care of the child, while your out exercising or doing something. Seems like your doing the work of a mother and a father. Good luck. lol you could also try to tell him your pregnant, and he’ll fall on the ground wondering if its his, if he hasn’t made love to you. That will get him into action haha.
I take it this is your first baby? From my experience of my wife having two kiddies, the stretch marks go away…the weight will drop…but you do have to work on it a little.
First thing that came to mind is “How much attention are you taking from your husband and giving to the the baby?”
And you do need to sit down and have a serious heart to heart with him.
work out….. you may have lost some weight…. but physical exercise can help tone the body up…. and make you look and…. more importantly feel better about yourself. The best exercise for stretch marks, and saggy skin, is sit-ups.
or perhaps….. you just have to look in a mirror….. and ask…. Am I attractive?
Get a personaltrainer and start staying out late. One night, don’t come home until 4 am. Men love a chase. If you appear needy and desparate, forget it.
they are marks of life honey, just like the ones that will appear on his body in quick time, be confident about yourself that’s what men find attractive, and by the way! you both got a wonderful baby from that belly of yours, he should be proud it worked mighty hard for nine mouths what does he expect? remind him of that……….
Give it some time but most of all communicate your feelings to him.
get surgery.. other then that try coacoa cream!! and do something sexy .. start going to the gym buy new clothes/ get your hairdone get sexy things yet makesure they hide your stretchmarks!